Gwen Araujo

Gwen Araujo:

 When I saw the movie of Gwen Araujo and when I read Learning from the death of Gwen Araujo it made me open my eyes to reality. This reading and movie made me feel mad and sad because according to USA it claims it’s a free country and it states we are equal in a way, but it truly isn’t. It is separated by gender, race, and sexuality.From what I understood in my history and politics class is that originally the US constitution/articles of confederation/ bill of rights was built for white people but more for male than female not any other race . As the years have passed it has changed for the better but there is still lots more progress/changes to be made. From what I understood or learned from the movie and the reading was that it all deals with money, race, sexuality, gender, religion, law, corruption, and news. With money you can live the life you dream. With corruption you can get away with bad things if you pay lots of money and know other people to help you cover your crimes. Gender, you have to fit the norms of male and female and what “ they represent”  and if you don’t you are looked as an “IT “ they dehumanize the person that’s where  Sexuality comes along the LBGTQ community.”If body fits into neither category,or crosses gender lines, it loses gender privilege and its assigned the lable “IT…”(Heindenreich, pg122).Race, whether you are, Latino, Black, Hispanic, Indian, Native. White automatically comes to my mind as “the lighter you skin the more privileges you have (but in all reality it’s mainly about white supremacy)”. Law is complicated but they are supposed to make things fair for everyone but in some cases they aren’t.  The news only follows what the most popular thing is, it shows what it wants to show and wont cover subjects most reality or they will cover it up with lies, also some people pay money to show on tv to make it public. Religion there are many different religions but if you don’t follow their beliefs and go against them you are considered a sinner etc…

I feel for Gwen Araujo because her life was very difficult. Everything that he went through and the way they killed her was just all unfair. She didn’t deserve to die like that no one does nor to be treated the way she was treated in school. Regardless of his race gender, sexuality, etc… she was still human she deserved to be happy and understood and more than anything she deserved to be respected.

The way I see life is that being a woman is so much harder than being a man. We automatically are perceived as the girl/woman to obey the man and inferior of them. We are always being criticized just by being woman in all aspects. Some Men see us women as week or the ones that need to be at home cooking, cleaning, and raising a family while the Man works and provides. Equality doesn’t exist even on works/jobs men get paid more than woman for doing the same job. Also for being a different race other than White. If you are not White don’t get much pay. The White people get richer and we stay poor or stay in living class. Other cases other races have to work much harder to wet where they are at, and they have it much easier than the rest of us. As stated in the story  on the 2^nd paragraph talks about wage and race. Depending on your race you get paid a certain %  but none are equal (Heindenreich, pg.126). Some think that we are devils /Sextual objects that we deserve what happens to us just by the way we dress to present ourselves.  I can understand to a certain extent everything she was going through. When she finally told her mom she wanted to transition. She was going through all the struggles a woman goes through daily basis, plus her being biologically male and fearing for her life. Back in her day years ago the world wasn’t as accepting of The LGBTQ community as it is today. She was already struggling with her family accepting her, plus school, society.

In this story and movie of Gwen I noticed all these factors that affected the way the LGBTQ community is perceived and treated, but not only that all other races as well. I will try my best to explain how some of these factors affected Gwen Araujo. As the story goes Eddie Araujo was transgender biologically, he was male but he identified as a woman and preferred to be called Gwen. When she was growing up she had a hard time fitting in with her family, school, church. She loved putting on makeup and liked dressing up feminine. The family knew something seemed odd, but no one really wanted to accept and still had hope he was not gay or transsexual. They wanted to be a “normal/ perfect family”. Another thing that we saw in the movie was that being a Latina or in the Latino family they went to Church and Gwen never felt like she fit and she felt God and church didn’t accept her. In the movie and in the readings we can see that the struggled in school Gwen didn’t really had any guy friends and was always hanging out with the girls. Gwen was bullied by the guys at school. The school had a problem with accepting her as well. As the reading talked about “Gwen did not droop out of school she was pushed out by an administration that supported a harassing climate and that could not understand the necessity of using a bathroom” (Heindenreich, pg.129)& “Her mother asked for bathroom modifications .The school refused. Students began to harass her.” (Heindenreich,pg118). And the movie I saw that the mom wanted for Gwen to go to school when he didn’t want to and they got into an argument. When Gwen walks away the younger brother is in the room and tells the mom “How can you want her to go to school when the staff doesn’t even let her use the restroom and kids threaten her.”.  The night she was murdered by the reading and by the few parts that were able to see on the film was that she was killed by 3 of his guy friends. They had found out she was biologically male and because she had had love relationship with them, they felt betrayed and killed her. The beat her up, choked her, and then buried her and put heavy rock on top of her body (disfiguring parts of her body) so the animals couldn’t get her out then they went to go have breakfast like nothing ever happened.  Once they guys were found they hired and attorney. In the movie and article, we see that in their defense it was Gwen’s fault because she didn’t tell them she was transsexual. Also, in the night she was killed they tried to judge her by the clothes she was wearing. It still doesn’t give them the right to kill a person just because someone didn’t tell their truth. I feel for Gwen because what is she would have told them the truth since the beginning or before having sex with them. Her life was still at risk. Another thing was that when she died she received very little (news) attention and the very little news that came out many people were protesting and yelling mean things. But what caught my attention was that after her death another white transgender person was killed they made the news public and he got good support whole Gwen being a Latina didn’t. The only way Gwen when public was because her mom started a movement to advocate fot the LGBT community or transgender community.

Citation:

Linda Heindenreich. Learning from the death of Gwen Araujo? Transphobic Racial Subordination and Qeer Latina Survival in the Twenty First Century

Agnieszka Holland and starring J. D. Pardo, Mercedes Ruehl, and Avan Jogia. A girl like me (2006)  

Where do I come from

Lincoln Park Art

Briana M. Tapia

 10/19/ 2019

Lincoln Park Art 

       While viewing all these beautiful murals in Lincoln Park I noticed that the murals had a representation of past and present history of Chican@s. I also noticed that there was a lot of paintings  women.There was a total of 19 women in these murals. When looking at these women's paintings I felt like some of the painting had double meaning  (good and bad). Over all I feel that these murals help us understand where we as Chican@s come from and help me understand the truth/reality of  our past and present. These murals opened my eyes on how far we have come. Yes there has been  lots of tough battle  we as (Mexican/American) been through, and yes we have made progress along the way. But I still believe  that we have to continue to make more changes for our future generations.  I feel that this park helps us want to be proud of who we are and what we represent in this community. I find it hard to just choose 1 mural so I will talk about several ones that I found interesting.



*Here are all the paintings of the women I found in the Murals.Here I see a mixture of all different perspectives of how they see us as women. Some can be seen as positive or negative.
1.
     When I see mural #1  it looks like Greek art  just by looking at the clothes(toga dress) the 2 women are wearing. The man  has the face and body features that comes from the  Greece art. When I look at this mural I believe its telling me that the sun represents masculinity. That we should look at the Men as the one with the power of authority of everything. That without men we as women wouldn't be able to procreate life.  That we women have to praise the men. It also brought to my attention about the discussion that we had in class about when the Greek mythology or in the passed they  believed that women were (half baked) that we were not fully developed with a penis. So they would degrade the women in that aspect. 

2.

          When I saw painting #2 it reminded me about my middle school teacher telling us about ancient Aztec Legend about a love story that took place in mexico city where you can find the 2 tallest Mountains/ Volcanoes in the city. From what I remember this story was about  Popocatepetl(Worrior) & Iztaccihuatl(Princess) that were deeply in love. Iztaccihuatl's father  challenged Popocatepetl to a battle in order to be able to marry his Iztaccihuatl. The way Popocatepetl to prove if he won was to bring the head of his opponent back to them. When Popocatepetl had won the battle, before going back to Iztaccihuatl  he send a messenger to deliver the news of his win to Iztaccihuatl but the messenger told her that he had lost the battle. Shortly after legend tells that she died of sadness or killed her self  because she couldn't stand the pain that she would never be able to see the love of her life. When Popocatepetl arrived for the princess they told him the bad news. Popocatepetl then takes the princess body to the top of one tallest (mountain/volcano), buries her body there and then he kills himself. Now the 2 tallest Mountains/Volcanoes next to each other are called Popocatepetl & Iztaccihuatl.


3.4. 
              
5. 
          Murals #3 #4#5 for me it shows a double meaning.
I see painting #3 of a symbol of God of rain bringing water to the indigenous people, or maybe the indigenous people praying to the God of rain  to send water. I see Mother earth on paining #5 it can be seen as  mother earth proving us with fertile grounds or on the other side people see women as a symbol of fertility of bringing like to this world(Babies).On painting #4 it reminds me of the story of Adam and eve. The story about Adam and Eve, when  the snake(devil) tempted  Eve to eat the fruit from the forbidden tree when God had told Adam and Eve not to. So when eve convinced Adam to do so God ordered  them to leave the paradise and we the women were cursed due to Eve disobeying God. Thatʻs why some people see us women as evil that we deserve to suffer. Overall if I analyze it again I can find it offensive as if they are trying to diminishing the women because men see us as if that thatʻs the only thing we were made for. Why can they see earth to be presented as just earth a planet an object a thing, why do they have to compare as woman. Painting #4 really bothers me, makes me mad because the way I look at it of representing the religious story of  Adam and Eve. I feel that we women donʻt have to be looked like we deserve to suffer because of  Eveʻs sin.
 How I personally analyze life is that everyone is responsible for their mistakes or triumphs. Eveʻs sins are her sins not mine and vice versa.

   
     
6.


I really like paining #6 it represents where our roots come from and where we are now. Specially in a place where we are a border city . Most of us here in El Paso can relate to this because we have family members that live in Juarez but we live in El Paso. This painting shows our roots that come from Mexico by showing the Aztec guy, but also show the the guy(Pachuco) wearing a suit for them it was a dressing style. After the police, media, military men, white supremacists labeled the Mexicans or Mexican/Americans that just by wearing that type of clothes they saw them as a gang , trouble makers, killers, thieves  etc.   thatʻs when the zoot suit riots started in 1942. I like how the painting  it represents more of the pachuc@s history and traditions they might still follow up with to this day. The way the city is represented as well we can se at the top the Lincoln Park where the paintings are located, the train that passes throur El Paso and Juarez. La plaza de Los Lagartos  que se encuentra en en centro. El Paso and the pachuc@s are so well represented here thatʻs why I love this painting.






7.→
I like this painting because I belive itʻs an "Adelita "  An Adelita  form Mexican history were the women that went to the Revolucion when people rebeled against their own Mexican Government to fight for a better equal nation. At first the Adelitas were just the women that helped the Men buy cooking for them during those times of war. They also took care of the injured soldiers, also even helped the men out buy fighting in war. Thats why we see this woman with a calavera head  with a cinturon de balas .Porque eso significa que tambien eran guerreras.

8.9.
Painting #8 I dodnt know much about Frida Kahlo but all i know she was the wife of Diego Rivera a famus painor. The dress she is wearing makes me think of the traditional Quinceanera dress. that represents  new beginning of transforming to a young woman. Painting #9 the represents the Catholic religion we catholics  pray / believe in  La Virgen. En mi familia, mi familia ora por la virgen  porque se relacionan con ella de que es madre. Le pedimos por nuestros hijos o nosotras mismas que nos ayude a sobre pasar preocupaciones  o miedos que le puedan pasar a nuestros hijos. Ella paso por el dolor de ver a su hijo Jesus morir en la crus y por eso nosotros asta siento nivel creemos que ella nos entiende de ese modo.

10.
I donʻt like painting 10 . Personal mente siento que les da mas poder a los machistas.Siento que asi es como  nos ven solamente .Que nuestro dever como mujeres deven ser amas de casa cuidar a los hijos o familia y saber cocinar y hacer lo que el marido " que deve ser el provedor "nos puede mandar.
  Makes me think of  women nowadays being misrepresented we are much more than that. Personal mente puedo decir que no solo sirbo para la cosina si no tambien yo sola mantengo/ proebo por mi hija  sin ayuda de un Hombre, soy una persona educada , y que quiere salir adelante.
11. 
12.
Painting 11 and 12 shows the history of the Civil Rights movements .We see how Cesar Chavez was represented buy making a change speaking up and fighting for better work conditions in the (farm/crop/agricultural lands ) Thanks to him and his people that help him out along the way we know have the farmers rights. Now we also have the safety and sanitation laws/ licencing in work places all over the country. I feel this painting represents that Mexicans and Mexican Americans are hard working people. These people are know what they are doing they are wise people,  life experiences has made them learn how to work in these places how to take care of these lands so they can produce food for the rest of the country. For those who are working in the U.S.A. and are immigrants and they donʻt have a degree the does not mean others can make them feel less of a person they are here to work to be able to provide for their families. I feel that thanks to their hard work we have foods in our tables right now. 

13.
14. #14 and #16  you can see evolution of  past and present mixed. They are still proud of their ancestors , the roots they come from and are not afraid to express themselves and still keep their traditions. I like the way they represent the woman on painting #16  I feel she is standing with a fearless face, with a " Masculine look" in reality states what does it mater what I wear  does not mean Iʻm a man for wearing " mans clothes, I fell she is just saying this is me and I can wear whatever I want". By the Mexican and american flags she has she i can tell she is a Chicana also by the bridge  represents the border city we live in . I feel like its states she is from both places or she has family in both places. 
15.16.
17.18.

19.
Picture 19 what I see in this painting  is different perspectives of life .
-I feel that the roses represent life and the bones represent death
-Positive or negative
-the reflection of the water  yellow and grey represent Light (God ) And  shadow (Devil)
-The octopus tentacle pulling the man down can mean our fears or , the government pulling us down  not letting you be successful, in life, and sometimes the group of people (family ,friends) holding us back.
-Over all it is up to us to fight for what we want to never give up. that we are the only ones that can choose whatever path we want to take.
-The chain night be the represented  the main goal someone wants but one self has to fight to reach it. or viewed  that help that can get you through life. also can be viewed as hope.


20.
 
 

Quien soy yo

Briana Tapia 

9/28/19

Quien soy yo:

This tree map represents my family, and  where my roots come from. From what I know my great grandparents  where from: Agustina was born in Torreon,Coahuila and lived in Ciudad Juarez. Soledad and Ines where both from Parral,Chihuahua and lived there.  Esperanza and Ruben  where both born in Juarez and lived there. Ramona was born in Chihuahua,Chihuahua and lived there. My grandparents where born from: Marina  born/lived in Juarez, Daniel was born in  Parral and lived lived in Juarez,Cecilia born/lived in Juarez, Raul was born in Chihuahua and lived in Juarez. My mother was born in Juarez but later on she went through the process to become a US citizen (Naturalized) ,and my father Raul was born in USA city of El Paso,TX  but lived in Juarez while growing up now he lives in the USA .I was born in USA , El Paso, TX but I lived in Juarez for 5 years before my mother found a steady job and a home over in El Paso,TX. 

      Growing up with my family in Juarez were the happiest days of my life. Every Saturday we would get together and have cookouts or go to my primos or primas b-day parties. We would use whatever excuse just to get together. We would get together and make cookouts if there was a soccer game going on, pool party, go to the park (El ParqueBorunda), La Feria, or just to go visit my great grandma Agustina, hang out at my Aunts and uncles house etc..  I remember that every Sunday we would all go to the Catholic Church together. Every Mexican holiday or even American holiday we would celebrate. I also remember that on some holiday I grew up following my families religious traditions. For 4th of July some of my family would celebrate independence day and have an cookout with hamburgers and hot dogs and dress very patriotic here in El Paso. For September 16 my family and I celebrate el dia de la independencia y vamos al grito in Juarez. On October for Halloween day some of my family and I  that lived in El Paso would get together and go trick or treating and go to the haunted houses.  For November I would celebrate El dia de Muertos. Haciamos ofrendas para nuestros  familiares que habian fallesido. I would also celebrate  El dia de gracias. My family  would have our Thanksgiving food with Turkey and salsa de chile de arbol and salsa verde to accompanying it with Mexican arros and pastel de 3 leches instead of pumpkin pie . For December my family and I  would celebrate el nacimiento de Jesus y haciamos posadas. I remember my great grandma Agustina or if I was with my grandma Cecilia  having us all help them make tamales, bunuelos, menudo, and arros con leche. To make Christmas a little fun for the kids,the adults would tell us about Santa Clause. For Eater my family and I would Celebrate el dia de la coneja( for the kids) but also taught us about resurrection day do to being Catholics.  I remember celebrating dia de los Reyes Magos and receiving presents and as Catholic is Los tres Reyes Magos encontraron a Jesus y le llevaron regalos...

    While going to school in El Paso I want to say I was very lucky in the school that I was. The school I attended was Alicia R. Chacon International school. I was in that school from kinder -8th grade. This School offered 3 languages. The 2 main languages were English and Spanish and the 3rd language we could chooses the one we wanted to learn.Our options were Chinese, Russian, German, or Japanese. My mother at the time choose Chinese. I believed this school taught us all how to accept/respect each other. In this school I grew up celebrating American, Mexican, and Chinese traditions.They taught me about the American, Mexican, and Chinese history. We learned how to read, write, and speak the language. In this school  I learned martial arts such as Kung fu and  karate, gymnastics, sports, Folklorico dance. Thanks to this school I had the opportunity to travel and visit China. I never had a problem trying to fit in with the kids in school  due to the teachers and staff always reminding us to show respect, accept each other, and to embrace who we are and where we come from. They showed us to never give up, and they believed in us that one day we will make it in life.  

     In high school I attended 2 schools J.M. Hanks HS and Riverside HS.   J.M.Hanks HS was my home school and there i played soccer my 4 yrs. Riverside HS Junior & Senior year half day. I was accepted in the culinary program. I want to say these 2 schools make part of  who I am today because they taught me commitment, dedication, and to give it my 100%. It was challenging at times but it was all worth it.En esta etapa  de mi vida es donde me empese a hablar Spanglish.  After I graduated I went to the Culinary Arts program at EPCC for the Pastry associates degree.  I loved this places because even if their main focus was about french pastries  due to us being a border city they also offered a Mexican bread class. They taught us how to make all the traditional Mexican pastries and a little bit of the history of it. 

     Shortly after graduating I became pregnant with a beautiful baby girl named Luna.  I'm a single mother fighting hard to be able to have a better future for my child while currently attending UTEP, and working a part-time job.Being a single mom is a hard job and in this time in life is where I have found my self being criticized a lot more than before.I hear people say "You got pregnant very young" "some people see me with a mad face when I go ask for government help"" Ya aruinaste tu vida "" Tu raza is known for having babies very young " etc... I'm learning how to let go of my fears of what others might think of me and my social status in life. I am realizing that the only person I have to impress is myself. Esta soy yo y soy orgullosa de ser Chicana (Mexican/American). Yo estoy orgullosa de mi familia, mi pasado y mi presente.  Yo soy la unica que definira mi futuro y mis triunfos.

    

    

  

Btapia La chicana

Briana Tapia

La Chicana

When I read the Audre Lorde essay about The Master’s Tools Will Never Dismantle The Master’s House I felt like she was disappointed and wanted change. This essay was about Audre Lord being picked to comment on some papers that discussed the “differences of American women race, sexuality, class, and age” as stated on the book (Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.94). While being in the Humanities Conference Audre started to notice that her point in being there wasn’t right because in some of the papers given to her to comment on, she felt like she couldn’t say anything about it because she didn’t relate to that subject in particular ”… model of nurturing which totally dismissed my knowledge as a black lesbian” (Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.94). She discussed about how she noticed that there was only two women and her in there commenting on the papers. Two of the women were picked last minute. Audre questioned how they could have taken their comments of each women as a final say without asking other woman. Audre felt that was very unprofessional and that showed the lack of research on their part. That’s when she understood that things don’t really change or if they do the change is very minimal. For many years the Men have let us think we have won by making small changes for women, but if we want to make a change and fight for equality, we must stop using our differences as excuses for parting us away and must from unity ”They may allow us temporarily to beat him at his own game, but they will never enable us to bring about genuine change” (Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.95). We must let out fears go, in order to finally start understanding our differences and be able to come together in order to make positive changes in life. This is the only way we will beat the Master’s house and break fee.

The way I connect to the message of the passage of And When You Leave, Take Your Pictures With You  is that I feel that other white woman  see me as if I’m uneducated, a person that has no goals in life  that will end up with lots of children and living off of food stamps and housing. Living in the city where the majority are Hispanics, I still feel judged by white people and sometimes by my own race. Also, our own raza can judge us the hardest. We women are so easy to judge one another without even knowing what each of us is really going through. “…but all of us are born into an environment where racism exists” (Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.58). I am a young single mother living on welfare, working part time being paid minimum, and going to school. I feel like I am being judged every time I renew these welfare services. The gestures some of the employees make, makes me feel like they think of me that I am a person trying to take advantage of the system for the rest of my life. They don’t know I don’t plan to live off the government services for the rest of my life. This is just while I get my life together in order to have a better future for my child. I wish I didn’t have to go through this but how the book say’s “but you work with what you have, whatever your skin color” (Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.58). I keep telling myself I’m not the first nor the last woman going through some of these struggles.  I feel like just because I’m Hispanic I must prove these racist people that just because I’m struggling right now doesn’t mean I’m less of a person for asking for government help.  Even if we fear reality or change, we all need to see the full colorful picture not just black and white (whatever we just want to see) for all of us to understand and be able to make a bigger change.

             

 How I believe that Audre Lorde connect to Chapter 5 from the book Borderlands is that in both stories talks about how both African American women and Chicanas/Mexican American women  we were all raised not to question why certain things must be followed   “As women we have been taught to either ignore our differences or view them as causes for separation…” (Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.95). Also not talking back to others "Boca cerrada no entran moscas." (Anzaldúa, 1987, Pg.76)”, we had to hide our emotions, personal opinions, facts, and just go with what the white people had to say and must follow the rules in order to fit with this country. Woman were constantly reminded that white people were superior than them.  Another good point to compare is how white people would dehumanized African Americans and Hispanics/Chicanos verbally ,physical punishment, etc. On the first page of Ch.5 talks about how a child was caught speaking Spanish and he got smacked in the on the knuckles with a ruler. He was also punished for trying to explain something to the teacher and she got mad, she took it as if he were talking back. She also told the student “If you want to be American, speak American. If you don’t like it, go back to Mexico where you belong” (Anzaldúa, 1987 Pg.75).  For the book The Bridge Called My Back on page 91, where Audre Lorde felt offended by what Marry wrote or published. Audre Lord felt like her voice and the voice of her African American community was seen in negative perspective/meaning as she states to Mary “What you excluded from Gyn/Ecology dismissed my heritage and the heritage of all other non-european women... I felt that you had in fact misused my words, utilized them only to testify against myself as a woman of color” (Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.91)

 The way both books relate to language is to speak out. We must fight for our voices to be heard and our stories to be written and be read. To have more variety of stories not just white people’s stories.” Until I have pride in my language, I cannot have cannot take pride in myself…until I am free to write bilingual and to switch codes without having always to translate…I will no longer be made to feel ashamed of existing. I will have my voice… (Anzaldúa 1987, pg.81). As for Audre Lorde I think that she is trying to tell Marry on “An open Letter to Marry Daly” that the way people right or say things might have a different impact of what others are trying to understand “When I speak of knowledge I am speaking of that dark and true depth which understanding serves,…accessible though language to ourselves and others ” Moraga & Anzaldúa, 2015, pg.91) . How both books connect is that we should be proud of our roots and to be able to understand and have empathy towards one another and to be able to accept each other differences. To be able to grow and try not to commit the same mistakes as passed generations did.  

Citations:

Anzaldúa Gloria. (1987). Borderlands -: La frontera. San Francisco, CA: Aunt Lute Books.

Moraga Cherríe, & Anzaldúa Gloria. (2015). This bridge called my back: writings by radical women of color. Albany: State University of New York Press.